Goddess morning Royals 👑. First give praise and worship to the all High.
Are you living the life you wanted or just surviving in the life you have?
I only ask because I see a lot of couples getting married 👰🏾♀️🤵🏾♂️ and congratulations 🎉 🍾 to you all for doing so! Marriage can be a wonderful union as well as life time of pain. Don’t get me wrong 😑 I believe in love, life, laughter, and togetherness, but we as people lose a part of who we are to become who someone wants.
We compromise our life instead of negotiating our terms. Yeah I know you have to give to get, but for most we give but never get. We give up dreams only to lose our way and become complaisant. All High forbids that something should happen and we need skills to continue on without that significant other, then what? I see it all the time where men and women compromise themselves right into hate, resentment and a demeaning life.
Then they throw children in the mix of uncertainty, misery, and hatred thinking 🤔, hoping it fixes the problem/situation. Praying 🙏🏾 it brings back the love but not realizing it will only make matters worst. Now the children suffers and believe they are to blame. Here is where you start to bargain more than negotiate!
First you play the victim, I gave up this and that for you. You start to realize that you compromised yourself into this situation. Now you have started the hate game. What use to be love ❤️ is pure hatred and you know that you are to blame but you rather point fingers. Then comes the begging. Can we just talk about it? We really need to sit down and talk this through, but talking turns into yelling, screaming and no one is listening to the other.
Then the lies appears and so do infidelity but not one sided. Here it goes both parties put others into the mix. The women tells all her girl friends of her problems, because that what “girl friends” are for, correct? Wrong, they are not therapist and you shouldn’t use them as so, because not all is for you and not come with loyalty and not all wishes you joy and fairness, nor happiness. Envy is a hidden talent that only shows up when your walls are down. Your married business is between you and your husband not your friends. Once you open that door 🚪 there’s no way to close it! Don’t do it to yourself. Even another married woman happy or not is a plan for making your situation worst.
Men aren’t any better running to his homeboys telling all he can about his problems at home. The same man you swear will do you no harm is the same homeboy that will be sleeping in your bed, single or not. Don’t add gasoline to the fire and expect for the flames to die down. That same girl friend or homeboy will be the one giving you the advice to either leave them or cheat. They are the ones moving in where you are moving out.
As trifling as it sounds, is more trifling that you made it happen. Stop 🛑 sit down and write out your terms. Negotiate your terms from this point on. Let your significant other know your feelings, wants, needs, and most of all don’t compromise them anymore. If you want a baby negotiate the deal, a better career or just a different career negotiate your terms, a better marriage negotiate your terms! Believe or not there is always someone who will better fit the Bill if you go in knowing what you won’t settle for and what you are worth.
Don’t live in misery because you believe it’s better than nothing. There is really no such thing as nothing! There’s always something but it is what you make it.
Sending you all love and kisses. #GoddessLove