Goddess morning Royals. First, give praise and worship to the all High.
Have you ever spent quality time with the children doing the things they wanted to do? Have you ever gave in to their wants and allowed them full control of what they wanted to do as a family? Or have you give them the options of doing what you think children should be doing and as long as your money was paying for it that was what they were going to do?
When asking the question what do you want to do as a family allow them to tell you and then do what they suggested. As long as it is legal why not? If they just want to go to the mall and hang out do that. If they want to go shopping and get their nails and toes done do that. If they want to go to the Arcade then do that. If they want to lay around and do nothing but watch tv, well get you ass on the couch and do nothing with them.
While you all are out, do not and I mean do not embarrass them! I can not express this enough, if you do they will never trust you with anything else. Be cool and laid back, they will not try anything stupid especially if you are one of those parents that don’t play. If you play it cool you will learn friends, hangouts, foes (even if they can’t see them), potential girlfriends or boyfriends, hobbies, and their lifestyle I know you don’t think they have one.
Sometimes we just need to enter their world. No not force your way into their life but enter their world so that we as parent can understand our children. We need to know what they are into and what they like to do when we aren’t around. It is still parenting but you are learning who your children are. No don’t become a best friend to them but be that person that they can trust to come to you with everything, honestly. If they want to drink and smoke then you need to march their ass to rehab and fast. That is a cry for help, especially if they are underage. Peer pressure is one thing but if they think they can drink and smoke with you that is a whole other issue that needs to be address. Like the lack of respect that they have for you knowing you are their parent, but if you haven’t been doing much parenting then that is another day for another discussion. If you have been trying to be their friend more than their parent you have lost the battle and the war already, as a parent. There is no turning that around at all.
So make family night about them and not about what you as a parent want to do but including them. No not this time make about them and let them feel like they are including you. They will respect and love you more for being a part of their life and not having to alway be apart of yours. In doing so you will learn signs of when your child is going through things that aren’t for them, like depression, anger, hate, peer pressure, bullying, frustration, broken heart, liking another person of the same sex or the opposite. Yeah I know fears we don’t want to face but as parent we need to address. In turn they learn things like family values, who they can trust with issues and concerns instead of trying to turn to their friends for the answers. They also learn techniques of how to deal with things on another scale and understand who really got their backs.
Sending you all love and kisses. #GoddessLove