Goddess Evening Royals. Sorry for the late post, really long day.
People seem to forget when they were in need of you or your services to the point they start to believe that you have a problem with them instead of the other way around. When they get in a bind or in trouble they seem to remember you are the family, friend and resource. As long as you are needed they are sweet, kind and humbled, until the moment you finish fixing their problem then they are rude, distasteful, disrespectful, obnoxious, and ignorant.
They seem to forget in that moment that you are the one who just save their home, car, life, job, hopes, dreams and maybe their relationship. They seem to think after you have solved their problem that you needed them. They can’t remember favors you have done for them, money you have lend them, or a place you have given them. They gain amnesia right fast and will have the audacity to challenge you to the time they returned some of your money, like they lent it to you. They will recall they time they gave you a ride after they have borrowed your car a million and one times. They will recall watching your child after you have been the daycare provider to all their children.
They will turn tail and run when you recall all the things you did and still are doing for them. As soon as you decide you aren’t doing for them or anyone else no longer then you are the worst person they have ever met. You are no longer loyal or family. You are a two-faced person or maybe even a liar and petty, but they can never understand until they are the ones in the position they put you in. Then they want to come to you and tell you all about how someone always need them. All you can do is look because you know you just had this discussion with them not even that long ago. It may have gotten ugly but you still being you listen and then walk away.
Here is what I say to you when you are always the giver. Learn NO! It may sound cruel but it will save you a lot of arguments, and headaches. It may even say you heartache depending on the person in questioning. If you just can’t say NO then you are in for a long life of the same thing for the rest of your life and from all people who are just users and never will be givers, well not to you at least.
Stop being the welcome mat and start being the leave your problem at the door mat. Make a mental note this vessel isn’t for bargaining if you are for giving as well as taking.