Goddess Morning Royals
I have several conversations with several family members over the years and it always come back to the same shit. When doing something for someone, in return they feel unappreciated or disrespected. I too use to feel this way but I had to let that part of me go and for these reasons.
- Am I doing this for this person for clout?
- Am I doing this to get something out of it?
- Am I doing this to be respected by this person?
- Am I doing this for me?
Asking myself these questions lead me to these answers
- No, what clout has to do with anything. If I am always the helper what clout am I building on to get back.
- No, because I am a good person and can do something without needing something in return.
- No, if they didn’t respect me before I did what I did they damn sure isn’t going to do so afterwards.
- No, what am I getting out of the deal if no respect is attached to it, nothing is going to come back in return and it’s not like I am getting recognition for it.
I do things for people because I am generally a good person, but I am also not stupid. If I believe or see that you are going to dog me or continue to want from to just to use me. I will say no to things you may very well need and not just want.
I say all this because I see people’s hearts get broken because they did something for someone they cared for, loved, or just felt bad for, but their was an alternative motive behind their assistance.
- If I do this for you, you are going to owe me one.
- If I do this then when you get this you give me that.
- If I do this for you go have to go out with me.
- If I do this you and I are dating.
- If I do this for you, you have to do something special for me.
- If I do this for you, I’m going to need it back immediately.
Now let evaluate the “if” factor.
- If the could give one back to you they wouldn’t ask you for one? Correct! If that was they case then they could have just held out to get that one themselves.
- If they get something and you want it and they don’t give it to you? Do you have a fit or just take what you believe to be rightfully your?
- If they wanted to go out with you I don’t think you would have to do them a favor first. They would have liked you enough to just go out with you but that isn’t the case now is it.
- If they wanted to date you they would have shown interest in you and not the favor they are asking of you. They would have just use all of them to get all of what you offer, but they didn’t just asked for a favor.
- Now come on, if they wanted to do something special for you they would have but they didn’t, but just asked you to do something for them.
- If they could pay you back immediately, they would just wait it out but obviously they can’t pay you back immediately.
When you alternative motive is to get something back and they didn’t express that they were giving you something but what you gave them then I think you are the one who is disrespectful. Stop looking for something in return! When God see you gave from the heart he will be the only one giving you something back and ten fold. If you are going to be a blessing to someone just be that blessing to them and stop looking for things in return. God is your blessing and he knows that all your promises is going to come with fault, but that doesn’t stop him from giving. Does it! NO, he gives without really getting anything in return. All he ask is that you stay true to him and yourself. I don’t think that is much to ask of you. So the next time you are ask or in divine favor of someone else, please don’t allow an alternative motive to be behind it because it may not end in your favor at all. If you can be appreciative of what God gives you then allow other to be appreciative of what God is allow you to give to them. That mean you are blessed enough to give and divine enough to receive greater for your blessing.
Don’t feel unappreciated because they aren’t able to give back what you were able to give to them. Just know that God saw it and that your greater blessing or equal blessing is on the way. Don’t feel disrespected when you feel unappreciated because you gave without wanting anything in return in the beginning. It is only when you have an alternative motive behind it, is when you feel disrespected and unappreciated. Learn from your blessings and move on.
Sending you all love and kisses. #GoddessLove